And Now for Something Completely Different

    By the time I reached high school I had engaged in sex with more partners than most women do in a lifetime, so excuse me if I had become a bit jaded. My new girlfriend Maureen assured me that if I spent the night at her place it would be unlike any experience I had previously had. As I was open to new experiences, I figured why not Maureen and her family lived in a nice bi-level in a trendy new subdivision. The whole family sat down for dinner and it couldn’t have been more Ozzie and Harriet if they tried. Conversation centered on school activities and plans for the upcoming holiday season. Maureen was what you would call big boned” for her age and didn’t socialize much at school. Her parents seemed thrilled she had made a new friend.

Her parents had jumped at the chance for her to have someone visit her and asked my guardians if I could spend the weekend. Maureen gave me a grand tour of the house ending in the backyard. Maureen’s best friend and pet was a mastiff, which eagerly responded to her every command. I was amazed at the tricks he could perform (like climbing a ladder, turning somersaults in midair and even dancing). I have to admit it frightened me a bit as it stood on its hind legs to dance with me its head towered above mine. After an hour or so of playing with the dog we adjourned to the dining room where the family played a several hands of gin rummy and spoke animatedly about the weekend ahead.

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